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part seventy seven
EXO COMEBACK EUREUREONG
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travel au
hg: so i, born in the world (anime!au, team baozi)
(Anonymous) 2013-08-05 11:24 pm (UTC)(link)Re: hg: so i, born in the world (anime!au, team baozi)
(Anonymous) 2013-08-05 11:24 pm (UTC)(link)Re: hg: so i, born in the world (anime!au, team baozi)
(Anonymous) 2013-08-05 11:28 pm (UTC)(link)He coughs, trying to get the water out of his mouth and lungs. “What’s ‘alive’?” he asks.
“Alive means that you exist,” Minseok answers.
“I exist,” he echoes. “Who am I?”
Minseok smiles wide. “Your name is Lu Han,” he says.
Lu Han learns this much: there are demons that only the chosen can destroy, and the chosen are few. And because of that, he was created -- to become one of the chosen, no matter what the costs. “A Second Exorcist,” he repeats slowly.
Twi Chang, who says she helped make him, smiles and nods. “Yes, you are a Second Exorcist,” she says. “And you will help save this world.”
He flexes his fingers experimentally and stares around the room -- wide, dark, filled with unfamiliar machines and devices. Twi Chang said that there is a world outside, but Lu Han’s entire world is confined to only what he’s allowed to see. “Alright,” he replies, not knowing what he is agreeing to.
“Miss Twi Chang said that we’ve already been sleeping for ten years,” Minseok says, sitting at the edge of one of the containment pods. Inside, another Second Exorcist lies submerged in lukewarm water, eyes closed. “I was the first one to wake up. Then you. And soon, everybody else too.”
Lu Han smiles. “That sounds great,” he replies. “And they would all be our friends, right? I’d like that -- more friends.”
“They have to wake up first. It could take a long time -- you know, I waited for months until you finally woke up,” Minseok says.
“But at least you have somebody to wait with,” Lu Han replies, nudging Minseok’s elbow with his own.
Minseok, though, sighs and frowns. “Sometimes I wish they would keep sleeping forever.”
Lu Han doesn’t understand what Minseok means by that until the experiments begin: they call it syncronization testing, but all Lu Han knows is that it hurts. They rip his body apart with electricity over and over again, only stopping when he completely stills.
“His heart has stopped,” he can hear the scientists say. “Ten seconds, twenty, thirty --”
After a minute, his heart starts beating again. The wounds close themselves up, and even lost limbs regrow with a matter of time. When Lu Han has completely healed, they kill him again, but he never dies.
Second Exorcists cannot die. But they do feel pain.
After the tests are over, he and Minseok sit in the chamber where the rest of the Second Exorcists sleep. Like his own, Minseok’s arms and legs are bandaged, and Lu Han wants to reach over and squeeze his hand, but it hurts too much to move. “I read a book yesterday about the outside world,” he says instead. “The sky is blue, did you know that? And sometimes there are these things called clouds that float in it. Happy clouds are white. Angry ones turn gray.”
Minseok cracks a smile. “I read about them too. The rain comes from the clouds. And snow, too -- when it gets cold, this guy called Winter comes and makes the snow fall down, so that everybody has to stay inside and wait for it to stop. And the plants outside get so lonely that they die.”
“What a jerk,” Lu Han says indignantly. “We should go beat him up.”
“But it’s not all bad. When Winter gets tired, a nice lady called Spring comes and brings all the plants back to life,” Minseok continues.
“Like us,” Lu Han says.
“Yeah, exactly like us,” Minseok replies. He laughs, and Lu Han feels warm.
When Lu Han dreams, he sees things that he has never seen before, and yet he knows what they are without thinking about it. The sky. A river. Lotus flowers, growing in the wetlands. There is a feeling in his chest that he doesn’t know how to explain -- something almost like yearning, but the yearning is happiness too.
From far away, somebody calls for him: “Lu Han!”
He turns, heart jumping, and knows that the person calling for him loves him --
He wakes up so suddenly that he nearly falls out of his bed, half-shouting as he scrambles to balance himself. “Lu Han?” Minseok asks, rubbing his eyes. “Are you okay?”
His heart is racing faster than it ever has before. “I’m alright,” Lu Han answers, and smiles. His body trembles.
Lu Han understands what it feels like to have his arms ripped from his body or to see his own organs splattered across the opposite wall. The dull ache in his heart is so much worse than that.
The tests continue on an irregular basis -- sometimes they happen every day, sometimes they go weeks without. “I still don’t understand what they’re for,” Lu Han mutters after a particularly harsh round, as he and Minseok wait for their dinner, accompanied by one of the scientists.
“Twi didn’t tell you about them?” the scientist, Edgar, asks. Lu Han and Minseok shake their heads; Edgar sighs. “She should’ve explained at least that much.”
“You can tell us, right, Mr. Edgar?” Minseok asks hopefully.
He sighs and rubs his head, but nods. “There’s a special kind of weapon, the only kind that can kill demons -- it’s called Innocence. But not everybody can use Innocence... it has to accept its bearer first. The tests are to increase compatibility between your bodies and the Innocence.”
Minseok frowns. “And that’s the only way? I mean... what if we just aren’t compatible at all?”
“Oh, no, you two are definitely compatible! We... don’t want to do this to you without reason, you know,” Edgar replies. He hesitates for a moment before seeming to realize that he has, perhaps, said too much -- “Minseok, Lu Han, what do you want for dinner? Noodles?”
They are suitably distracted enough by the promise of food that they stop pressing the subject. Neither of them, though, forget it.
Lu Han dreams, and the voice that called to him before comes again. “The lotus flower is beautiful, isn’t it? From the depths of the mud, it sheds light upon the world,” she tells him, reaching over and holding his hands as he rests her head on her lap.
“Beautiful,” he replies, but he isn’t talking about flowers. The voice that comes out of his mouth doesn’t sound like his, but he knows it is his.
“It resembles the destiny of an Exorcist,” she says. “We, too, will return to the earth someday.”
“Not today,” he replies, squeezing her hand. “Not if I can help it.”
Lu Han wishes he could just look up a little further, to see her face -- but she smiles and covers his eyes with her hands. “Go to sleep,” she whispers.
“Mr. Edgar, what does it mean when you think about somebody and your whole body feels strange?” he says, waiting for when Minseok is in the middle of tests to ask. He doesn’t know why, but it feels embarrassing to say things like this in front of him. “Like it’s heavy and warm. And your heart feels like it’s singing.”
“Why do you ask?” Edgar replies carefully.
Lu Han frowns. “Sometimes, when I sleep, I see somebody in my dreams, and she...”
He trails off, but Edgar nods in understanding. “It’s complicated to explain, Lu Han. But I think you might already know the answer to your own question.”
The tests stop temporarily, and so do the dreams. Lu Han spends his time with Minseok every day, walking from here to there and nowhere in particular. “I wonder if there’s something wrong,” Minseok says when take a break to sit by the containment pods. As always, the other Second Exorcists lie in them peacefully.
Lu Han shrugs. “Who knows? I wanna go outside.”
“Yeah. I wanna see the sky.” Minseok smiles and reaches up towards the ceiling -- “I want to feel the breeze.”
In his dreams, Lu Han has, but he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he stands before offering a hand to pull Minseok up, too. As they make to leave, Twi Chang and a few other scientists block the way: “Lu Han,” she says quietly. “We need to do some tests on you.”
He and Minseok exchange glances. There’s something wrong about this, and both of them can feel it -- Twi Chang never comes to take them to the testing rooms personally. “Special ones?” he asks.
She makes a face as if he’d slapped her. Before Lu Han can react, though, Minseok grabs his hand and starts running. “There’s something wrong,” he says between desperate gasps for air. “This doesn’t feel right --”
They’re fast, but their legs are shorter and there’s nowhere to run to. They make it to the main hallway and around the corner before they’re caught
“This isn’t a normal test, is it?” Lu Han asks as the scientists strap him down by the arms.His tone is calm, but it’s all he can do to keep himself from shaking -- underneath him, he can feel circuits buzzing and sparking.
Edgar is the only one who looks up to meet his gaze. “I’m sorry, Lu Han,” he says softly. “But you can’t remember. It’s... better for you, if you don’t remember.”
One of the scientists flips a switch. He only lasts a few moments before he blacks out --
(“-- you have to come and find me when it’s all over with, Lu Han,” she whispers into his ear, cupping the side of his face gently. “Promise me.”
Lu Han swallows heavily. “I promise. Xiumin.”
She smiles, and Lu Han thinks to himself I can’t die, not tonight, I have to meet --)
(-- he raises his hand towards the sky, covered in blood and dirt. “Sorry, Xiumin,” he whispers. A demon’s face, a demon’s claws --)
-- only to come back to with the next jolt of electricity. He gasps for air, head spinning as the circuits wind down to a low buzz, pulling against his restraints. “No, I can’t die, not here,” he says, tears stinging at his eyes, smashing his hands against the metal plate he’s lying on. He feels bone shatter, but for once, it isn’t painful -- with his hand in ruins, he manages to pull it out of the restraints.
“Lu Han!” he hears from somewhere, and he turns his head around wildly. “Xiumin,” he cries out desperately. “Xiumin, is that you?”
“Take this,” the person says, shoving a blade into his hands, now beginning to heal and reform. He vaguely recognizes it as the Innocence the scientists had tried to force him to synchronize with -- this time, though, there’s a faint humming that emanates from it, and when Lu Han touches it he can feel it come alive.
“Xiumin?” he asks again. He blinks a few times, trying to clear his vision.
It’s Minseok. “Who’s that?” he asks. He, too, has a blade of some sort. But unlike Lu Han’s, his connects straight to his back in points, almost like a skeletal wing.
“Nobody,” he lies. It takes him a few moments to notice, but the room is eerily quiet. “Where... are all the scientists?”
“If you use the Innocence, we can die,” Minseok says, ignoring him. “It’d be better if we died.”
Lu Han wants to explain no, I can’t die, not when I promised, but he knows there’s no way to make it sound rational. “I don’t want to die. I want to...”
“We were never supposed to be alive in the first place, Lu Han,” he cuts in, looking more agitated than Lu Han has ever seen him before. “Haven’t you ever thought about it? Why we’re called Second Exorcists?”
“It doesn’t matter,” Lu Han says, voice rising as he grips the blade harder -- a sword, he realizes. Minseok, he realizes, has begun to remember, too. “We’re alive, aren’t we?”
“It wasn’t meant to be like this,” Minseok replies softly. “I saw them, when I went to go steal the Innocence. I saw the bodies -- our bodies -- it’s wrong, the way we came back. It’s wrong!” He swallows hard; the blades on his wings shift and extend. “We should just die here,” he says.
But Lu Han raises his blade before Minseok does.
Only when Lu Han makes it outside does he realize they’d been underground the entire time. The grass is light green, and baby birds chirp -- above, the sky is blue, not a cloud in sight. A breeze blows against his face comfortably. It’s spring, and Lu Han is alive again.
In the distance, he can see lotuses blooming.
- twi chang & edgar are characters from d.gray-man, reprising their actual roles here
- lotus symbolism: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nelumbo_nucifera#Cultural_significance
- if this went like in canon, lu han will eventually realize xiumin=minseok and they (kind of) get a happy ending. kind of...
Re: hg: so i, born in the world (anime!au, team baozi)
(Anonymous) 2013-08-05 11:34 pm (UTC)(link)Re: hg: so i, born in the world (anime!au, team baozi)
(Anonymous) 2013-08-05 11:26 pm (UTC)(link)