yeah sometimes i really do wonder about what goes on in the mind of these fansite masters bc not only is it a pretty intense commitment to run a site but it also makes you be surrounded by other fans so you're constantly surrounded by this culture of obsessiveness and it can probably fuel you to becoming more and more delu/obsessed. the fansites that close down after an oppar gets caught in a scandal are probably in the minority that do actually fall in love with their oppar u_u