exomeme | part two hundred and fourteen

i don't mind losing too much but i'm really upset that it seems like a lot of fellow dopparnons jumped ship or felt discouraged to post :(

any team that ends up with team chen is lucky tbh

go to sleep! i'm confident b will make it n_n

fantasy theme
inspired by the monster in pan's labyrinth

and it qualified as a hattrick
are you kidding me

5 minutes left D: D:

you risk overtime

a ton lmfao

lol i love this

omg

lmfao ty meme for giving me the will to live again

i'm sf pathetic but rn idc \o/

my stomach is churning

damn team a

does this even get points lol

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same here anon, xiuhanyeol are my top 3 opgers so kisses to all the stans~

da ah :/ take it up with moddirs in their concern post?

hp au 1948w

feeling pretty guilty that i didn't help rn lmao

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em moddir pls update the links soon u__u

same timezone nonnie! yes rest up fellow team b anon. i'd be resting later once the coffee high goes down

heavy breathing

On Valentine's Day, the rest of the boys send Zitao to spy after Yixing and Baekhyun's date.

"You're the only one who mastered the animagus spell among all of us," Lu Han says as a matter of fact five minutes after Zitao's alarm goes off. "It'd be easier to follow them that way without others noticing you." He grins from his bunk above Zitao's, stretching lazily and swings himself to look down properly. Zitao with his head still peeking out of the covers only grumbles in reply and pulls his baby blue blanket over his face. He still wants to sleep in, damn it. "No," he says flatly.

"Hey, hey." Lu Han tries to poke him with a candy like stick he probably got from some muggle store ("It's called Amazon," Lu Han innocent corrected him last night, chewing it slowly before screaming in delight, "it tastes better than the ones from Jelly Belly!") and fails miserably because of his unfortunately short arm. Unsatisfied, Lu Han waves his hand and suddenly there's an arm snaking around Zitao's torso. In one swift movement, his boxers are down to his thighs and Lu Han's laugh crackling above him.

"Fuck off, you pervert," Zitao screeches, tumbling down his bed and lying in what seems to be meters of Lu Han's hand. Lu Han only pouts at him before Zitao finally huffs indignantly, tucks his boxers up and storms out of their room.

-

Half an hour later, Zitao finds himself seated on the floor of the Room of Requirement with seven other wands pointed at him. It's not frequent that EXO (short for EXpecto Patronum, a secret organization with members from different houses, mostly composed of prefects and high ranked students) are gathered all together, but apparently today is a crucial day. Yixing, the only girl in their group, is leaving the grounds for a date with Gryffindor's prefect Baekhyun Byun.

"Zitaooooooooooooooo," Joonmyun croons. "ZItaooooooooo-"

"No, Joonmyun," he refuses nicely, closing Joonmyun's wide open mouth with his palm. "I'm not gonna spy on them."

"But think about Yixing," Lu Han says dramatically, wiping his forehead. "My poor, dear Yixing in the hands of that basic-faced dwarf--"

Zitao cuts him off. "That's too much, he'd be mad to hear that. Also that still doesn't give me the right to follow other people's much awaited date." To some degree, it's true. Yixing hadn't stopped babbling about it for the past three days, and Zitao also heard from Chanyeol how worked up Baekhyun became to think of something special for this day. "I don't want to ruin it just for you horrible people's enjoyment."

"You're not going to ruin it," Kyungsoo coaxes. "Just making sure our only girl doesn't get tainted by him. Or something. You know how the rumors go. Byun Baekhyun's too... loud and obnoxious for Yixing."

Jongdae snorts beside him. "You're just jealous Baekhyun turned out to be actually, I don't know, straight."

Kyungsoo elbows him square in the jaw. "Shut your face, Kim Jongdae," Kyungsoo snaps. "Or I swear I'll turn you into Zitao's cat."

Chanyeol, who's unfortunately Jongdae's roommate cuts in and says, "How many times do I have to tell you I'm allergic--"

"No one cares if you die wheezing," Kyungsoo says, turning back to Jongdae. Chanyeol looks utterly hurt, but it's not like it's something new. "So keep your mouth--hey!"

Before they can even start another duel with their wands, Minseok already summoned them into his hands. "Stop acting like kids," he says seriously before tucking both wands into his robe's pocket. "Back to Zitao. Can you do it?"

Zitao looks at Minseok's face. Today his voice sounds so... deflated and dead, and yet his eyes are squinting, kind of like those moments when he just wants to get something and uses his I'm Minseok And You Should Follow All My Orders face to his advantage. Looking away, Zitao purses his lips. "It's Valentines day."

"It is Valentines day," Joonmyun finally says, panicking a little. "More dangerous because everyone would be necking and snogging everywhere."

"Yixing is old enough for that," he says. Seven pairs of eyes turn to glare at him and Zitao smiles at them, feline eyes crinkling. "Just kidding."

"Okay, let's be clear on this." Lu Han moves away from the floor and walks toward his designated chair, hesitating a little. Zitao has a bad feeling about this. It's never a good thing when Lu Han is serious about something. "We're all curious about their relationship. You know how Yixing's like--she's dumb and careless, she's naive. Maybe it's because you weren't here during her first year in Hogwarts, but she basically followed anyone--it was sad to see."

"If me and Minseok hadn't taken her under our care, she would still be lost and people will take advantage of her personality. Do you understand?" When Lu Han looks at him straight in the eyes, Zitao can see the fire behind them, clouded with a hard look as if he'd kick Zitao out of their group if he doesn't obey him. Zitao gulps, now a little nervous, because Lu Han would do that. "She's very precious."

"I get it," Zitao says dejectedly, "Yixing's safety more important. I get it."

Lu Han's face brightens up. Too bright, Zitao thinks, watching as Lu Han's jaw detach itself as he gapes happily. "You're the best member I've ever had."

It's not going to be that bad, Zitao thinks to himself, watching as they all breathe a sigh of relief. Jongdae turns to him and starts petting his hair while bickering with Chanyeol about their afternoon plans.

It's just Valentine's Day, I'll have it again next year. Zitao curls his body, chin tucked on his knees, and draws sappy broken hearts on the dusty floor.

#

Zitao thought it's going to get better, but now he's stuck in the Hufflepuff common room with everyone packed inside and Lu Han fretting and mapping out plans in the air with his hand. They aren't really allowed to go inside, but since Joonmyun and Minseok are prefects for Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff respectively, the paintings let them in with pleasant faces save for one dirty look at NUGU the Slytherin.

"Here is the agenda," Chanyeol says, pen cap in his mouth as he takes out the notes he's gotten after eavesdropping on Baekhyun's conversation with another Gryffindor Quidditch player. "I heard that they're going on a broomstick ride first, but Jongin's got that covered." They all look at Jongin sleeping soundly on the couch. Chanyeol purses his lips. "Yeah, when he wakes up that is."

Lu Han subtly kicks him on the foot and whistles as he walks away, leaving Jongin looking around for the culprit and punching Jongdae next to him instead. "That pervert, I bet he was thinking of Yixing's hands all over his waist as he speeds up," Lu Han seethes. "What a dirty bastard."

"Actually, according to my sources Baekhyun is actually a gentleman," Kyungsoo comments seriously, scrolling through his iPad (Lu Han's gift during Christmas, of course, where else would he get a muggle device?).

"This is not the time to defend him," Joonmyun says sourly. "They're meeting around 11." He looks down at his watch. "Which is technically 10 minutes from now?"

"What," Jongin says, rising to the balls of his feet and scurrying to the door. "I'm leaving first."

"You know what I don't understand," Zitao says slowly, watching as they shift their attention from Jongin back to him. "Is that you guys are pretending you don't know how Baekhyun is like. He's always been fond of Yixing."

Jongdae gasps comically. "We don't know who Byun Baekhyun is," he says. "It's not like he's one of our members or something."

Chanyeol stifles an awkward laugh. "Ha-Ha. Nice joke, Zitao."

Zitao sighs. "Sogogi will be--"

"Who? Lalala, I can't hear you," Lu Han sings, followed by an off key Jongdae.

""There's no such thing as Being Friends with Baekhyun for today. He doesn't exist in our memory," he finally says, frowning. "Today, I am standing in front of you as the leader."

"What about me," Joonmyun says, blinking confusedly. "What is my role?"

Lu Han gives him a stern look, then, with a small smile says, "you're in charge of the financial support. Very important."

The rest of the members' laughter bubble around the room, voices bouncing off the wall. "That's great," Jongdae says, pinching his arm. "Really, really great," he assures.

"I guess so," Joonmyun says, a little unsatisfied. "I'll give you a pouch of gold before you leave. I don't want you to get hungry."

Zitao wants to say, no thank you, I have my own money, but he nods instead. "I should leave," Lu Han scowls. "Make use of all that stuff you learned in some mountain in Quingdao. Be, I don't know, useful."

Zitao ponders for a moment, remembers all the prominent buildings and industrial zones he used to lounge around in, the beaches he frequented at night. "I never stayed in a mountain in Quingdao. It's a civilized city. You should ask Baekhyun, he's been there before."

"That's not the point." Lu Han shrugs and finally climbs down the ladder to tug at Zitao's feet. Lu Han looks like a rag doll in his worn out shirt and barely visible boxers. "And it's only you who doesn't have a Valentine's date. Sehun has plans. NUGU texted me an hour ago saying Sehun left the house early."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Zitao snaps back, gasping a little as if he just heard the most insulting statement of the day. He sits up, covering his bare chest. "And excuse me--you don't have one either. I might have plans later, too."

Lu Han laughs like he wants to console him, but it ends up as a sorry smile spread across his lips. He throws him a pair of sunglasses from the dresser and pats his ankle morosely. "Honey, please don't even joke around. Your sense of humor is not entertaining."

Zitao severely wonders for a moment the pros and cons of punching Lu Han's face but finally gives in, feeling defeated.

Oh. "I have to go see the Potions Master today." This is a good plan. Lu Han's too much of a goodie sometimes to make him not go, especially since it's Severus Snape we're talking about--

"Joonmyun got that covered," Lu Han says affirmatively, and soon enough Joonmyun emerges from the door holding his personal gold debit card.

"Financial support for everyone," Joonmyun says happily. "Especially when a member's safety is concerned. Also, I'm sure Snape won't mind."

"You do know that Baekhyun is not a pervert or some sort, do you?"

"Hm," Joonmyun says, scratching his chin thoughtfully. "I don't know, you tell me. He gets a little touchy with everyone." Joonmyun shivers a little bit.

"Do we even know the same Sogigi?" Zitao's eyeballs almost roll out of his face. "I at least know that he won't be harassing Yixing. Come on, trust the guy a little."

"Baekhyun has a list of girls that he dated," Minseok reasons from the opened door. Zitao's face falls as if he wants to scream you too? and Minseok ducks when Zitao threatens a pillow on his face. "We're not sure how teenagers work in Canada. You know, safety measures."

Lu Han laughs in delight, palms planted on his knees and Zitao rolls his eyes as he watches Lu Han freak out to himself. "Okay, okay? We got this. You got this. Mission: Save Zhang Yixing part I, accomplished!"

the ot3 date hasn't happened yet ;;

part two hundred and fourteen

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Re: TEAM B

wc!au: team sehun [c] doppmonster

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Re: last hour points so far

Re: wc!au: team sehun [c] doppmonster

Re: wc!au: team sehun [c] doppmonster

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wc!au team sehun [c] with donghae/amber toop

Re: wc!au team sehun [c] with donghae/amber toop

Re: wcau: team luhan [c] soccer trio

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wc!au: team dage [c] - TY TEAM B! (14p)

wc!au: team bbh - ot3 date [c]

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Re: wc!au: team bbh - ot3 date [c]

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Re: TEAM B

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Re: wc!au: team bbh - ot3 date [c]