577w; sutao Even when everything is falling apart, Joonmyun can't bring himself to apologize. It isn't pride or masculinity it's just he lacks the want to preserve their friendship. It was nice, that's all; it wasn't amazing or wonderful or beautiful. It was just something to make the nights less lonely. So even when Tao is destroying his bedroom all he can do is sigh and pick up the lamp and try to scoop up the large pieces of glass from the picture frame. "Did you even care at all?" Tao ask once everything is visibly broken in some way.
Of course he cared, he thinks for a moment he might have even cared more than Tao did. It's just he tried so hard to get them together and keep them together, he ran out of steam. After the time Tao suggested they break up because Joonmyun even thinks to suggest he shouldn't go out this weekend. Or when Joonmyun has so much work to do, he doesn't have time to call Tao on his birthday until 8pm and the other man swears he forgot. Tao is passionate in all the wrong ways and some of the best. And even now when he's angrily trying to blow the hairs away from his eyes Joonmyun finds him attractive.
"I hate you." Tao says before attempting to work his way through the path of destruction he has created in the room. But before he can make his exit Joonmyun is pulling him back and whispering to him. Tao is still frigid in his hold, not wanting to give into a touch that could be the last. He wants Joonmyun, but he doesn't want to get hurt, again. He's always 'too something' too fast, too immature, too clingy. He decides that he was going to be himself. He was going to do what he wanted and not worry about Joonmyun's thoughts on the matter. But then he became 'too distant' or 'too headstrong'.
"We can make this work?" It's more of a question than a statement and Joonmyun doesn't answer with words but with gentle kisses placed from his neck to shoulder. Tao knows this isn't the last time they'll fight. The last time he'll threaten to leave and mean it with all of his heart. It's just who he is. But maybe the next time it will be under different circumstances. Maybe he won't be too much of anything, maybe it will just be their expiration. Joonmyun always told him forever was a lot to ask for and Tao is finding it more true. As all their friends break up and grow apart he realizes forever isn't something you can ask for, you have to strive for it too.
A few months go by and Tao comes home early. He's excited to see Joonmyun deciding not to call and offer his boyfriend a surprise. But he's the one whose surprised when he sees his boyfriend in bed with someone else. He doesn't want to fight or break things he just wants the awful images of the person he loves with someone else out of his head. Joonmyun knows that for Tao it's over. He doesn't have the will to fight, he isn't screaming and from what he saw there isn't even any tears. It hurts more than the screaming and the fighting. Knowing that he wasn't worth fighting for anymore hurts the most. And he truly learns the value of forever.
team chen
Even when everything is falling apart, Joonmyun can't bring himself to apologize. It isn't pride or masculinity it's just he lacks the want to preserve their friendship. It was nice, that's all; it wasn't amazing or wonderful or beautiful. It was just something to make the nights less lonely. So even when Tao is destroying his bedroom all he can do is sigh and pick up the lamp and try to scoop up the large pieces of glass from the picture frame. "Did you even care at all?" Tao ask once everything is visibly broken in some way.
Of course he cared, he thinks for a moment he might have even cared more than Tao did. It's just he tried so hard to get them together and keep them together, he ran out of steam. After the time Tao suggested they break up because Joonmyun even thinks to suggest he shouldn't go out this weekend. Or when Joonmyun has so much work to do, he doesn't have time to call Tao on his birthday until 8pm and the other man swears he forgot. Tao is passionate in all the wrong ways and some of the best. And even now when he's angrily trying to blow the hairs away from his eyes Joonmyun finds him attractive.
"I hate you." Tao says before attempting to work his way through the path of destruction he has created in the room. But before he can make his exit Joonmyun is pulling him back and whispering to him. Tao is still frigid in his hold, not wanting to give into a touch that could be the last. He wants Joonmyun, but he doesn't want to get hurt, again. He's always 'too something' too fast, too immature, too clingy. He decides that he was going to be himself. He was going to do what he wanted and not worry about Joonmyun's thoughts on the matter. But then he became 'too distant' or 'too headstrong'.
"We can make this work?" It's more of a question than a statement and Joonmyun doesn't answer with words but with gentle kisses placed from his neck to shoulder. Tao knows this isn't the last time they'll fight. The last time he'll threaten to leave and mean it with all of his heart. It's just who he is. But maybe the next time it will be under different circumstances. Maybe he won't be too much of anything, maybe it will just be their expiration. Joonmyun always told him forever was a lot to ask for and Tao is finding it more true. As all their friends break up and grow apart he realizes forever isn't something you can ask for, you have to strive for it too.
A few months go by and Tao comes home early. He's excited to see Joonmyun deciding not to call and offer his boyfriend a surprise. But he's the one whose surprised when he sees his boyfriend in bed with someone else. He doesn't want to fight or break things he just wants the awful images of the person he loves with someone else out of his head. Joonmyun knows that for Tao it's over. He doesn't have the will to fight, he isn't screaming and from what he saw there isn't even any tears. It hurts more than the screaming and the fighting. Knowing that he wasn't worth fighting for anymore hurts the most. And he truly learns the value of forever.