part seventy two

[exomeme]

EUREUREONG EUREUREONG EUREUREONG（●＾o＾●）

kisseu

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*hunger games au week 1 | 2

Comments

Re: ITT: constructive crit for HG!

[(Anonymous)]

a complex sentence is a sentence with multiple clauses! one independent clause and at least one dependent clause, though generally they can use more dependents. basically, all of your sentences that have a lot of commas in them are complex sentences. :) because you have several clauses. complex sentences are great, but if your entire writing is built up of complex sentences, then it gets to be a bit jumbled and too fast paced. my suggestion is to alternate and make sure you have a healthy balance of simple sentences and complex sentences alike!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complex_sentence this might help!

Re: ITT: constructive crit for HG!

[(Anonymous)]

omg anon ty so much ;; so i'm trying to go through complex sentences (and asking for help from my friends too fml) but i still can't quite understand the grammar but basically...use...shorter sentences....?

i feel like i do have a tendency to get carried away with my commas so i'll just keep on trying to cut down even more haha /o\

Re: ITT: constructive crit for HG!

[(Anonymous)]

not so much shorter sentences as...well basically, you have a lot of modifiers and dependent clauses elaborating on your independent clauses. for some of your sentences, those modifiers are unnecessary. your sentence gets the point across just as well without the dependent clause as it would with it. so just try not to over-elaborate every little detail!

commas are good but too many commas starts to look messy. >: try experimenting with semicolons, or even just making more individual sentences.

Re: ITT: constructive crit for HG!

[(Anonymous)]

...there's too many words here that i can dictionary define but can't figure out what they mean together rn i'm so sorry anon ;~; I'M GOING TO TAKE SOME TIME TO MULL THIS OVER AND DIGEST THIS and take your advice to heart! although i do understand the part of not over-elaborating so i'll start keeping that in mind right away!

i'm so sorry i'm so bad at this grammar thing and english thing i'm seriously so terrible at it

semicolons and periods, here i come haha